1) I'm with Russell Crowe on a big ship (like in Master & Commander) and the ship is sinking because the crew hit it with their own cannons. The ship sinks and everyone is happy and laughing.

2) I'm a guest on David Letterman along with Janet Jackson, and it's the day of the show and I'm walking around the studio. I tried to get on an elevator with Janet, but the doors closed too fast. Suddenly, I'm a black guy and I have really long hair. I'm getting my hair and make-up done before the show, and the lady is trying to make my hair look really funky, but it doesn't work, which is good because I don't like it anyway. Now I look like myself again, and I finally run into Janet and tell her I totally intend to buy her new album, but I'm in the military and in the middle of deploying to Iraq and all I brought was my iPod. I'm hoping for some major sympathy in the form of a free CD or autograph or kiss, but she just looks at me and smiles and says "thanks." Also, the whole dream is interspersed with scenes from the movie "Mumford," which I've never seen.

1) I'm working as an operative in some foreign country where the government is corrupt and holding a bunch of people captive. I'm trying to help this girl escape and I meet up with her, and all she wants to know is where she can get Taco Bell.

1) I'm back in Misawa, and I'm giving a new guy a tour of the base. We're driving around the flightline, and I'm trying to show him all the cool stuff that Misawa has, but he doesn't seem too impressed. So we go to the BX and start looking at X-Box games.

1) I'm working as a counselor in a high school, and I'm lecturing this female student who doesn't like to participate in class and kinda has an attitude. After she leaves, I start talking to the other counselors and saying how I wish I was more of a rebel and an individual when I was in high school instead of such a follower.

2) I'm hanging out at Caleb's house one afternoon, and I realise it's getting pretty late and I'm supposed to be having people over to my house that night, and I still have to go to the grocery store. So I get to the store and I'm looking at the milk, and I see two different sections of milk and I don't know what the difference is between the two. I start reading the labels for each, and I see this other woman is doing the same thing. We start talking and we decide that one section is the regular section and the other section is the organic milk. I start putting a few gallons of organic milk in my cart, and then I see Caleb pushing my cart and he tells me I have too much milk.

1) I'm at some kind of summer camp with my family, and I get in trouble (I don't know why) so they make me deliver mail for the rest of the week. Ken, a guy from my shop, is there, and he tells me he's supposed to drive me to the main counselor's cabin. I told him I could drive there on my own, but he says since I got in trouble, I'm not allowed to drive, either.

1) I'm deployed to Guatemala and we're working on the demolition of an old building. My brother is operating a big crane and I'm riding on the wrecking ball. He gets really mad at me, and starts chasing me around this old building. At first, I'm fighting back, but then decide I'm going to lay there and be peaceful and just let him beat up on me. He decides not to. Then we go back to camp and we're all planting gardens and trying to decide which vegetables to plant and where to plant them. Plus, we all have to decorate our tents in a certain way, and I want to put Christmas lights on mine. Then I'm getting ready to go to bed, so I take a shower and I realize I'm out of q-tips, so I go out to the bus to see if the bus driver, who happens to be Don, has any. He does, but he's only got a few left, so I tell him I'll just do without.

1) I'm snowboarding with a bunch of people I don't know, and the snow on the mountain isn't very deep. We keep coming across patches of grass. It's getting really dark outside, and one of the guys I'm with says his house is just ahead. So we snowboard into his yard, and go inside for a while. I hang out with his family for a while, but decide I need to get home, so I start to go outside and put my snowboard on. I'm kinda worried because it's dark and I don't know my way back very well. Then his Mom comes out and tells me she'll take me home in her truck.

2) I get orders to go back through basic training again. I get there, and everyone is really nice, like we're at summer camp or something. We're checking into our dorms, and outside, Liz Phair is putting on a concert, but nobody else knows who she is, so I start requesting songs and she starts talking to me. I go back in and we start playing these cheesy icebreaker games. The only person I recognize is this guy from my shop that I don't really know that well, so I'm desperately trying to make small talk with him. I'm also worried about whether they'll let me keep my contacts in or if they'll force me to wear those ugly basic training glasses.

1) I’m in Vegas with a bunch of people, and we’re looking around for Jim and Nicole’s house.  We find this electronic map, and I point to where their house is with a little pen, and suddenly, all of us are right outside their door. We go inside, and Jim and Nicole start cooking us this really great vegan dinner. We're all eating and decide to go walk around downtown. We end up in this really scary neighborhood, and decide to turn around and go home.

1) I’m driving through Morganfield with my parents, and we stop at a motorcycle show so my Dad can check things out.  We’re walking around looking at all these motorcycles, and I see a bunch of my Dad’s old girlfriends.  I’m wondering if my Mom will get jealous, but she doesn’t.

1) I'm at this big waterfall with James Murphy and his parents and we're taking a big tour of the area. Then the waterfall stops, so I decide to climb up the side of the mountain. I get towards the top and the water starts flowing again, but it's going over me, so I'm not really getting very wet, but I can't see anything because of all the mist. I want to get to the top, but I can't, so I start to climb down again. When I get to the bottom, I see James and his parents get into a big truck and drive away.

1) I'm on tour with the choir in college, and we're staying overnight at this cabin in the woods. There's a really scary monster outside, so everyone's really afraid. A girl and a guy start fighting, and she grabs his shoe and throws it out the door, but he doesn't want to go get it because he's afraid he'll get eaten by the monster.

2) I'm sitting in the kitchen in the house in Morganfield watching Alanis Morrisette sing at some awards show on television, and my Mom comes in and she's been crying, so I ask her what's wrong, and she won't tell me. So I keep asking her and she finally says that she and Dad have been thinking about having another child and they were supposed to have a doctor's appointment the next day, but my Dad couldn't get out of work. So, I hug her and tell her how awesome it would be if they had another child, but whatever's best.

1) I'm in class in college, and there's a new guy I've never seen before, so I decide to be nice and introduce myself. He's a football player and he comes back to my dorm room and shows me this really cool website. He ends up hanging out for a really long time, but it's starting to get late and I want to go to bed. So I put on my pajamas and he just kinda stands there looking really clueless, like he doesn't know I'm trying to go to bed and he needs to go home.

1) I'm at my house in Morganfield for lunch, and my parents are there, but they go back to work shortly after I arrive. Before they go, they ask me to do a few chores while I'm home. So, I eat really fast, and the phone keeps ringing, and I'm trying to get all these chores done before I have to go back to work. I'm doing the dishes, and there's something wrong with the garbage disposal and it keeps shooting food up all over me.

1) I'm helping teach a bunch of people how to swim. One of the other teachers is Tania, and we're standing by the side of the pool talking while all the students are in the water. One of the students is a little older, and I look over and see her getting out of the water, so I walk over and ask her what the problem is. She says she's upset because she's older than the others but can't seem to pick up the technique as well, so I give her a little pep talk and she gets back in.

2) I'm moving into a dorm room, and by some mistake, they've put four people, two of which are girls, in the same room, which is meant for only two people. The other guy in the room is Brad, so he and I start thinking of ways to build a loft into the room so everyone has a place to sleep. We start playing around with guns and shooting at each other, but not really intending to hurt anyone. Then a bunch of FBI agents bust in and interrogate us regarding what we think about the cast of ALF.

1) I'm on this big trip through the mountains with everyone from the Hospitality House. We're all in a big bus and the roads are really curvy and everytime we go around a sharp curve, I keep thinking the bus is going to fall over the side. We stop at a rest stop because Jean-Marie has to pee. I get an e-mail on my phone from Don, who is waiting at our destination, asking where we are and how long until we get there. I write him back saying we should be there in a couple hours. We get back on the bus and the trip seems to be taking a lot longer than a couple hours. We finally get there, and we're in this big city and Melissa is there. We go into a bar and Melissa starts riding a mechanical bull.

1) I'm talking to this guy who sells cars, and he asks if I'll help him. We go to some kind of convention and set up a booth, but nobody stops to talk to us, so I quit.

2) Ann Williams and her husband, Jon, are in Utah for Jon's promotion ceremony. It's at the Chapel, and I walk in and see a local TV news crew doing a segment, so I'm trying really hard to stay out of the view of the camera. There's a children's choir singing and they sound really great. Later that night, I'm at home watching the news, and I see the segment.

1) I'm at a big science fair, but it's, like, in the 1800's or something because they have an old telephone here and the people are talking about how it's going to revolutionize the future.

2) I'm at the BX looking for a last minute gift for someone and picking up my dry cleaning. They're getting ready to close and the lady working there gives me attitude about being there so late.

1) I get hired at Gap as a manager, and it's my first night of closing the store. I can't remember all the stuff I'm supposed to do, so I do what I can and then drive over to another Gap to ask their manager if I did everything right.

2) I'm getting a new job as a civilian on base, and the lady I'm going to be working with is showing me around the office. We're walking around, and we go into the Chapel and I see a Chaplain and his wife that say they recognize me, but they can't remember from where. So I start listing off all the places I've been stationed and TDY and deployed, and then they say where they know me from, but it's not one of the places that I've been. But they keep insisting that's where they know me from, so I just go along with it.

1) A bunch of people from Misawa are staying at this big hotel suite on a mini-vacation. We're going out the lobby doors and I see this really attractive girl, and she asks me what my name is, so we start talking and she tells me she has a drinking problem. She comes with us and we start going to all these different festivals around the area. We're all at one festival where everyone is jumping up and down and carrying these big sticks, and Kerry tries to explain it to us. We stay out all night long, and get back to the hotel suite the next morning. Everyone checks out and goes home, but when I get home, I realize I've left some clothes at the hotel, so I have to go back.

1) I'm getting ready to leave Japan, along with Jimmy, and they don't have room for us in billeting, so we're staying at this tiny Japanese hostel. It's on the third floor of this old building, and to get up to it, we have to put a ladder together. But everytime we put the ladder together, someone comes along and takes it apart. Later, we're walking around outside and I jump in a little pond, but I don't know there's a drainage line in the bottom of the pond and I get sucked down into it and have to push myself out.

2) I'm walking around a mall and there are three guys walking a few feet behind me. They're talking really loud, and I can hear them say mean things about me. I get outside the mall and I see a big lake. As I'm walking by the lake, I see Jean-Marie hanging out in a little speed boat. I get in and we start talking. Then she gets out, so I decide to take the boat for a ride around the lake. I'm driving around, and I see a big cliff and Paul is at the top getting ready to dive off. I stop and watch him dive, then he swims over to the boat. I get in the water and start swimming. We're swimming around underwater, and I start to run out of breath, but Paul pulls me down and somehow conveys to me that he wants to know if it's possible to feel the presence of God underwater. I'm about to run out of air, so I just nod yes and start to swim up, but Paul pulls me down again and tries to ask me another question. I just start nodding and then Paul nods back and we both swim up to the surface.

3) I'm at a Gap in Vegas and I'm asking them about getting my old job back, but they tell me they're over-staffed. I start talking with everyone and then Mike, one of the managers, asks me to take some jeans back to the stock room. I take them back, and Mike meets me back there and tells me he's going to put me on the schedule anyway.